Dressing Rooms

How I love dressing rooms. Especially now. I'm thoroughly convinced that if the camera adds 10 pounds, the fluorescent lights and the dressing room mirrors add 20. Mom and Dad came to pick up Riley yesterday so I could go look for a dress for our renewal ceremony next weekend. Going in and out of dressings rooms I was reminded of a female comic who was talking about trying on swimsuits. She was in a dressing room looking at herself in the 3 way mirror when the sales clerk walked in and asked how she was doing. The comic said that she wasn't quite sure and didn't feel like the suit flattered her somewhat full figure. The clerk said, "Well, the fluorescent lighting in these dressing rooms really isn't that flattering." The comic said, "Yeah. Like the sun's going to be any better...."

Needless to say, I still don't have a dress yet. I'm not procrastinating, I just work better under pressure.

When we were all home last night, Riley got his bubble bath which he really enjoys. He hasn't figured out the bubbles yet, but he seems to like them a lot. After that, we blew his hair dry and put lotion on his baby skin. I always take Riley to Ryan before I put him to bed so they can say good night. There have been some nights where Ryan hasn't been able to say goodnight to Riley and I swear, he doesn't sleep well at all on those nights. So after we said goodnight to dad, I gave Riley his bottle and got him to where he was very drowsy then put him in the crib. As soon as I did, his eyes snapped open and he immediately wanted back up.

When I was at the pediatrician's office earlier this week, the doctor said that I had to stop letting Riley fall asleep with his bottle. I had to let him learn how to fall asleep in his crib by himself. It's best if he knows how to put himself to sleep if he wakes up in the middle of the night. His instructions were to lay him down, then leave the room. He said to wait about 10 minutes before I went back into the room and just to rub Riley on the back. "Do not," he said, "pick him up." He also advised not to stay in the room longer than 30 seconds. He added that maybe the stronger of the two of us (Ryan and me) should be the one to go in the room.

I went back into our bedroom after laying Riley down and Ryan told me that Riley was not happy as he pointed to the baby monitor, which was lit up like a Christmas tree and emitting my son's unhappy screams. I explained what the doctor had said with a heavy sigh. After probably closer to six or seven minutes (I did manage to make it more than 5), I had to go in and check. And of course, I had to pick him up. As soon as I picked him up, he fell asleep so I know he was exhausted. However, as soon as he felt his back hit the crib, his eyes snapped open again.

I told Ryan he was going to have to go back in the next time. So a few more minutes passed as we both stared at the monitor and as I silently tried to convince myself that I was doing the right thing and following doctors orders.

Ryan got up and headed out of the bedroom. I thought for sure the "stronger of the two of us" was going outside to indulge in his only bad habit. After a couple minutes, I didn't hear anything on the monitor. I thought that Riley had finally fallen asleep and I breathed a sigh of relief. I wanted to give him another minute before I went to check on him to make sure that he was in a deep slumber. The last thing I wanted to do wake him right back up when I checked him.

After a couple more minutes, I thought for sure Ryan would be back in our room. He was taking a little longer outside than he normally does. But, I thought to myself, maybe he'd gotten a call from a golf buddy while he was outside or maybe he was just enjoying the evening air. I decided to go check on my little guy. When I got to his room, my heart melted. There was the stronger of the two of us, sitting in the rocking chair, rocking our son to sleep. My eyes welled up and I felt so proud of my husband, and the best father in the world.

I love seeing Ryan with his son, just as I will love seeing him with la bean and whoever else comes along. Ryan is definitely my calm in the storm and constantly reassures me that no matter what the dressing room mirrors may reflect, he thinks I'm as close to perfect as I can be. Which just makes me want to be the best I can be for him, for our family and for me. I'm so glad he picked me to share his life with and can't wait to finally celebrate our union with all of our family and friends.